postheadericon Is Your Girlfriend A Compulsive Liar?

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by Joelk75

Is Your Girlfriend A Compulsive Liar?

Ideally, a relationship should be built on trust, respect and honesty. Keeping important things to yourself and not sharing it with your partner might eventually ruin your relationship.

There is such a thing as being a compulsive liar. If you are in a relationship and you love your partner too much to let him or her go, then you might want to take a look at the signs and reasons behind being a compulsive liar:

This bad habit can stem from having a very low self-confidence.

There are several reasons why one would compulsively or deliberately lie.

One of which is having a low self-esteem. If you do not love yourself enough, then you can never love anyone else completely and selflessly.

Having a low self-esteem can later on lead to compulsive lying.

Take this as an example. A girl who had a humiliating childhood experience or comes from a broken family is very ashamed of her family background.

Before she finally reaches adulthood, she is at a very awkward stage where it takes very little to wound her fragile ego.

As a result, she makes up stories about his family background, and lies about herself.

Once she sees that her stories are weaving magic on other people and the stories make them like her, what is the result?

She will keep on weaving lies, and this habit she will take with her until she grows into a mature adult.

People with this complex never think that they are, nor will they ever be, as good as the people around them. In the above example, once the girl turns out into a woman and she is at a stage where she begins to have relationships, guess what will happen?

Instead of breaking the chain and finding ways to stop the habit, she will keep on lying to keep a man interested.

In the end, she will never have a stable relationship because the truth about her will come out eventually.

What if my girlfriend IS a compulsive liar?

If you are a man with a girlfriend who is a compulsive liar, there is a very high probability that you will get hurt in the process. Once you find out about the web of lies that she told, will you still find it in your heart to forgive her?

Unfortunately, having a relationship with a compulsive liar is quite harmful to other people’s feelings.

Compulsive liars cannot help lying ‘even to their loved ones’ and if you have a girlfriend with this condition and she does not want to seek help, then you are at a crossroads.

As heart-wrenching as it is to let go of somebody you love with this kind of situation, you have no choice but to let go. Otherwise, you are just letting yourself in for more heartbreak.

Compulsive liar sign #1: I am afraid to face the truth.

A compulsive liar feels that it is but natural to lie, so she is actually afraid of facing up to facts. She is always in denial. She wants to believe the lies that she made up, so much so that she sometimes believe it to be true. In fact, she wants it to be the truth.

Usually, compulsive liars develop this habit at an early age and it is carried on to their adulthood.

Compulsive liar sign #2: My lies are better than your truth.

Compulsive liars usually experience jealousy and fear towards other people.

He or she will also feel that since they are so used to lying, they can easily see through the deceit of other people. Thus, they show an air of authority, and they think that other people will never see through their lies.

This develops into a vicious cycle that is even more destructive for the person with this complex, and will surely affect the people around him or her.

Compulsive liar sign #3: I lie for my own purposes.

This statement is actually a lie by itself because compulsive liars can lie for any reason at all, even if they would not gain anything from it.

The habit of lying has become deeply indebted in their system that they cannot escape from it.

The Cure

The cure for compulsive lying depends on the person herself. If you are in a relationship with someone who is a compulsive liar, ask yourself, is she worth saving? The answer is, of course! Any person who wants to be cured of the compulsion to lie is worth saving.

The key is that she herself should want to change and do away with this habit. With some professional advise, some help from you and your loved ones, then you can take the first step to curing your girlfriend from this ‘disease’ of compulsive lying.

71 Responses to “Is Your Girlfriend A Compulsive Liar?”

  • Maggie:

    my girlfriend lies to me all the time and she keeps telling me she’s going to change for me but never does. I really don’t want to loose her what should i do to help her change?

  • Myles:

    Hi. I’m 22 years old and my girlfriend is 19. I have recently discovered some odd stories that she has been making up. I check up on her twitter once in a while and I notice that some of her tweets are about these made up things of her and I or sometimes just about me. She’ll mention stuff like “My baby surprised me this morning with an unexpected visit.”, when it never even happened. I’m beginning to worry that either she is ashamed of me and our relationship or that she has some sort of a mental illness. We don’t get to see each other too often since we’re both doing our own thing, so a part of me feels that may be the reason why she makes things up. Also, she does have a history of depression and anxiety disorders. Thanks a lot for your feedback.

  • liza:

    Hey my names mark and my girlfriend has left me two days before valentines day, the reason for this is that I’m supposably a compulsive liar, and she thinks I like another girl other than her and idk how to explain to her anymore that I’m in love with her and she’s my everything! It really sucks because I can’t say anything that is true, for example she asks me if I looked at that girl and I really didn’t I’ll say I didn’t and she will get mad walk off and call me a liar. Idk what to do please help me I love this girl so much I can’t lose her for nothing.

  • jag43216:

    Well, we’re not officially a couple yet, but we get closer romantically each day. We even have confessed our adoration to each other. One thing that bothers me is that some time ago, before I had this special relationship with her, one of our mutual friends told me that she’s a compulsive liar. She was caught lying several times over unimportant things. So far, I haven’t caught her lying to me. She even strikes me as a pretty honest person. But still, before my relationship with her get further, I want to know for sure if what our friend said was true. Should I just ask her straightaway? Thank you.

  • The Dark Knight:

    i have been with my boyfriend for over a year and despite early warning bells which i blindly refused to hear i have just found out that he is a compulsive liar, not for any gain, just all the time, i love him so much but everyone tells me to leave hiom as hell never change!!!

  • xiM Clutch:

    We’ve been dating for a couple of months now. And just recently she said she had leukemia and that she was going to die. I found out through her family that she hasn’t even been to the doctors recently. I called her on her bluff and she said she was making an excuse to run away. She said that she puts on acts all the time and is never the real her. She says the real her was the one who loves me but she said that I have gotten to close. That I’m just going to get hurt in the end. And she is still lying constantly. What should I do?

  • Boo Cookie:

    I have a friend who I don’t think will be a friend for much longer, she lies about everything for no reason. She told me lady gaga replied to one of her tweets on twitter, but refused to give me her twitter username so I could see, she also claimed to have punched this guy who was irritating her in the face, but when I asked her what happened in front of the guy’s best friend she flat out denied ever saying that. I’m not a confrontational person whereas she is, and she gets quite aggressive if she even thinks you are saying she is in the wrong.

  • Cliffy N:

    I’ve been with her nearly two years now, Im 24 shes 23, and about two months ago she told me that her original portrayal of her past was a lie. She originally said she’d had a couple of relationships and two one night stands. But that changed to NINE one nighters. Obviously I felt betrayed because she sold me a false image of herself. In her original portrayal she told me she had kissed another lad when she was with her first boyfriend but today she told me that she actually cheated on him! Wtf!?! I feel like I don’t know her at all…lies after lies. Even her first sexual experience she lied about saying it was her first boyfriend but it transpires it was actually a one night stand!

    What should I do?

  • veemodz:

    Whenever I ask her anything, she will directly lie to my face. She would lie about her own hair color. Most of her friends are my friends and even they say this. At first I thought she was cheating, and she probably is but I don’t even care anymore, I need another reason to break up with her to be honest. She lies about the height of her dad, the name of her dog, and her moms maiden name. Obviously this is not all the she lies about, but she will lie about everything. I will ask her “what did you do yesterday” and she will say something like “I went to a theme park” and when I talk to her mom later, I’ll bring up the theme park just to get a conversation started, and her mom doesn’t know what the phuck I’m talking about.

    1. Do you think she is cheating?
    2. She lies to her friends as much as she lies to me, why?
    Edit: She smokes weed everyday and I think she drinks almost everyday, could this have something to do with it?

  • John:

    she cheated on me a while back, and the way i found out was pretty horrible, and even though it took a long time, she eventually showed she was sorry and we are still together. it has gotten to the point where i dont get that jealous of her male friends anymore. i still want to keep this relationship going because shes a much better person now than she was before, but somewhere along the line she became a compulsive liar, and will lie to anyone about anything that makes her look bad, or cheap, or trashy in any way. i found out she met a guy for coffee a few weeks ago but she doesnt know i know, and even though she normally tells me if she plans to meet someone, this time when i asked her in a roundabout way she denied it and lied about it. im sure it was an innocent conversation because he wanted to talk to her about stuff that i was aware of anyway, but its not the act that bothers me, its the lying. how can i change this, cos i dont want to be with a liar, but i want to be with her?

  • Big Banger:

    Well let’s put it this way, I have a boyfriend, we both are 15, and we have been in a relationship for two months. Now here’s the REAL problem….

    He lies, about EVERYTHING. He lies about really important stuff too, but has been caught every single time. Now I am finding it really hard to believe anything he says, it’s crazy!

    I do love him to pieces, even if i’m only 15, and I really want this to work, but i’m getting so tired and insecure with his lying, I don’t know how long I can take it. Help?

  • Joey 01:

    Can a compulsive liar get any better if they work on it by going to therapy, support groups and working on it themselves?

    Please give me some hope!

  • Peter:

    would you think that a compulsive liar is a good parent for young children?

    I see it as if my 5 and7 year old are living with their dad and when they start being able to catch their dad lying about every single little thing they are going to start to think it is ok to lie about stuff and try to justify it with ” well my daddy doesnt tell the truth”

    this has been over 5 years that we have been seperated / divorced for 4 of those years and nothing but lies the whole time and when i was with him for 2 1/2 years it was all lies then too and our relation ship started with the lie that his girlfriend at the time was just a friend. he really is a compulsive liar and i am not exagerating it. he will like to me about having a dr appt when he really has church. that is something that makes absolutely no difference if he has a dr appt or church he is just bussy but why lie about the small stuff. he will lie the car is getting a dent fixed when its the brakes and some stupid crap but it just comes down to morals
    Category

  • Salam:

    We have been dating for 3 months and me and my family believe that he has some sort of psychological problem. He is constantly lieing but does not admit to it. Most of the lies seem to be a way to get sympathy. I tried to confront him about it but he still insists that he is telling the truth. Im starting to think that he is believing his on lies. Can someone help me figure out why he is doing this?

  • fattiemanny:

    I posted a question earlier – my partner (very early) this morning announced he needs help. He has been lying about various aspects of his life. From previous jobs, girlfriends, to being in the army when he was younger and much more. He broke down. He says he doesn’t feel like himself, like he’s just part of some made up story and he’s scared of what is reality now because it makes him sad (basically last night a few friends found out about his lies and one of them gave me a call to ask, but obviously I was none the wiser at the time and said not to worry about it)

    I have been chatting with him over email as he is at work and he doesn’t sound like a happy bunny at all. He keeps saying things like he hates himself, he can’t stand his own company, he’s scared. I have NEVER seen him like this and honestly it is upsetting me, but i’m being positive to keep him spurred on that it will all be ok in the end.

    I want to know if you think these suggestions are a good idea to help him at home to battle his need to lie/make up stories. (I have spoken to my GP and she is happy to see him, but HE has to make the appointment himself, so I will suggest this when he gets home) I am obviously no psychiatrist but I want to help him feel more comfortable with confronting this.

    I have suggested that when he comes home we can sit down with a cup of tea and he explains each lie, one by one, and explains the element of truth behind each one (or if he finds it hard talking he can write each one down on individual bits of paper, scrunch them up, put them in a bowl and together we can pluck one out at a time and confront it, so he doesn’t feel alone doing it – so I can explain to him that the truth is a good thing, and there is nothing to be ashamed of or even hide completely. He has so much in his life to be proud of, he shouldn’t feel the need to exaggerate to hide the fact he doesn’t feel good enough.

    I also think if he remembers the reason behind each lie. Where was he? Who was he with? Does he remember the first time he ever told a lie, was it to make himself feel better? To make someone else feel better? Was it a funny story to amuse his friends?

    I think if he can understand and accept WHY he started telling his exaggerated tales, then we can work on changing his behaviour, I want to offer him opportunities of praise for NOT lying. Plenty of praise for the truth, maybe a weekly prize of a meal out together, he can choose whereever he wants to eat, so there is something in it for him to reward him for correcting his lies and telling the truth (yes I realise I am considering conditioning my partners behaviour… I know he’s not a dog, but it is just a suggestion) positive reinforcement is very effective.

    If you can think of any other ways of helping him to over come his need to lie, then PLEASE suggest me things and I will consider their effect. I also realise there are going to be serious social implications ie friends are going to be hurt, betrayed by his lies, so if there are any ways of handling the aftermath, please help.

    Thank you.
    I have called my GP for some advice and she is happy to see him and arrange for the relevant therapy, but it has to be HIM to make the appointment. I think he will be ok with this, but I was just looking for ideas to help himbetween therapy/while waiting on therapy
    I didnt actually consider that the reward system would be patronising, but again thats why my question is here to find out if these ideas are of any use. They are not set in stone, I was just trying to find out little ways of helping him.

  • toysruslover:

    I just recently got engaged. We have been together for over 2 1/2 years. The relationship started very rocky, a year in I discovered many lies, one about him talking to another girl stating he loved her. Being I was not aware he was a compulsive liar and him only messaging this girl, I gave him a second chance. As the relationship progressed I thought everything was going well until I began to find out about his lies, most just little things he knew I wouldn’t like, but just the fact that he continued doing it, I lost my trust in him. we’ve fought many times and I’ve tried leaving him many times as this has pushed me to the point of depression. I have never been able to leave him before, always coming back because I love him and I feel he truly needs me. He’s admitted to having this problem, and wishes he could stop, but he is unable to. I am on the edge and starting to believe he doesn’t deserve me. I just told him again I wanted to end this relationship and am feeling very strongly about it. I just need.advice on whether I should stay and help him with this because I do love love him, or end this to be able to help myself and stop hurting. I don’t mean to sound selfish, but its been almost three years and things haven’t got much better. I know the decision is mine to make, I just need some insight on my or these kind of situations.

  • Terrence:

    Like I know shes loyal to me and we really love each other a lot but… some of her stories she tells me seem a little out of hand. Like she’ll say that she was sitting down somewhere and like a whole bunch of guys were trying to get with her and all this and it leads off to something else like a fight between them or something. Like it seems to mostly come out in the stories she tells me but some of them arent that out of hand. And one time I asked her how often does she lie and she said compulsively but who knows I may be lying about that. Idk what to do… how do I know for sure if she is and how do I fix this?
    No! Im not going to dump her it shows how much you guys put thought into things theres other ways to fix this but after Ive been with her for almost over a year now theres now way Im breaking up with her wtf ever you guys are no help…

  • Con Orpe:

    i have had a girlfriend that i truely love. i just lost her due to my problem. i have obviously lied a lot. i know i am compulsive/pathological liar because i find my self lying when i dont even need to lie. i have looked up symptoms of both and they all describe me. she doesnt know i have it. how can i tell her i am? how can i fix my self? i cant help my self to lie. its becoming too extreme and i need help

  • Rishi:

    I have a few questions if anyone can help.
    What’s the difference between compulsive and pathological liars?
    Do they lie constantly, or just sometimes?
    Do they know they’re lying, and if they try hard enough, can they stop?

    Thanks everyone.

  • Praveen:

    i’ve lied about having girlfriends and about stupid small things ! I’m happy in a real relationship now and I can’t stand the guilt anymore ! please help !
    I know that i should tell her that i have lied but i’m afraid that it’ll mess up the relationship with her and my friends ! of late for the past 4 months i haven’t lied at all but it still keeps haunting me !
    I’m not lying about this … seriuosly ! I think it’s time I slapped myself in the face and stopped the entire bullshit !

  • Mark M:

    Long story short my girl’s and her ex had a bad relationship. He turned out to be a compulsive liar and cheater. Fast forward 3 years, now she’s with me and we’re building a strong relationship for a year. I get along great with her mom and family. Her mom can be very passive at times because she loaned my girl’s ex money and he never paid her back. So I don’t understand why my girl’s mom hides that fact that she’s still in contact with this guy because he treated her and her daughter like crap. It’s making my girl very upset that her mom is doing this and I don’t know what I should do? Like should I feel like this is a competition?
    Why would her mom keep in contact with a guy that treated both her and her daughter bad? I thionk her ex is doing this just to piss my girl off. He has mental issues…lol. If he really cared about my gf mom, he would pay her the money he owes.

  • addmeonxbox360myuserisfallior:

    I know this guy who sits there and will lie about his whole life…how much money he has, what his parents do, how he used to model, how many hot girlfriends he has had, where he lives, etc.

    In truth, he’s poor, lives in a bad neighborhood, has never modeled and has never had superhot girlfriends because (I’m not trying to be mean) he’s not attractive and is overweight, and I have no idea what his parents do.

    But he doesn’t lie about small things, usually. I thought that compulsive liars would lie about things that don’t matter, like what they ate that day to how the weather is outside. He doesn’t do this–is he still a compulsive liar?

  • Lasagna delivery guy:

    I have been going out with my girlfriend for approx. 5 years. We moved in together in 2010. I lost my job shortly thereafter. It became very apparent, once we moved in together that she was a compulsive liar. After constantly calling her out on it, she walked out 6 weeks after we moved in together. She left me with a pile of debt and all of the expenses that come along with living in a “hipster” neighborhood (where I didn’t want to live in the first place). Spent all of my savings, ruined my credit, cashed out my 401(k) and I feel because of her I am broke and forced to rely upon her.

    We got back together 6 months later (on my part, out of desperation to survive) The lying became worse. Now it is years later, I still do not have permanent work and cannot afford to fully support myself because of the stagnant economy. I am in school and graduate in 2 years.

    I have been coasting in this relationship and treating her as the “right now” girl, fully knowing that I do not have a future with her. I no longer call her out on her lies. I honestly do not care. I feel that if she chooses to life her life that way, so be it. She has fully separated the different aspects of her life (work, school, friends, family and our relationship) so that she may perpetuate her lies without getting caught. Her friends are her life and come before everything, including me and even herself!

    I feel like I am stuck in a dead end relationship and cannot get out. I recently turned 30. I am looking to settle down and start a family. She doesn’t believe in marriage, deep to her core. I am starting to feel like such a scumbag because if I had an out, I’d take it- like we are leading each other on…

    I would really like to know how to get her help. I love her and want her to get better. But I feel like I deserve to be happy and I am NOT! In addition to being a compulsive liar, she is extremely narcissistic (a trait inherited by her father) and texts herself, acting like she’s the other person (possible split personality). How do I even confront her on any of this? Is the old adage true- people cannot be helped if they choose not to be helped?

    It is incredibly frustrating to live with a person living with mental illness(es), especially when they feel that there is nothing wrong with them. I’m looking for advice on how to get her the help she needs, how to deal with the emotional scarring that she has inflicted and what, if anything, can I do without her “freaking out”?

  • easton j:

    My friend was talking to me about a book which seemed interesting and I couldnt find a book that matched the description:

    1 ) It was written or contains a character who is a compulsive liar

    2 ) There were two parallel stories at the same time during the book

    3 ) He said something vaugely about a door perhaps or a mysterious path/doorway …

    Thanks for helping

    :)

  • Anny:

    I’m 14 and I have a ‘friend’ I use the ” because I don’t like her really, because I know she lies to me and once she told me that her and other friends were going out and asked me if I wanted to come, she told me to wait outside on some street near a shop, she never showed up. I was stood there for like 45 minutes or something.

    Anyway so as well as that she lies to me about her parents, she said to me that they told her she was fat, and needed to lose weight therefore she missed lunch at school. She lied to me about her parents jobs.

    She always messages me these stories about how she held hands, went out with or whatever guys that I like or think are good looking.

    One of her most popular lies is when she goes out wearing literally nothing and sees a lot of fit guys. (this has happened about 10 times)

    It’s like this:

    “Omg I saw Tom today in the mall, it was so awkward because I dropped my bags so I had to bend down wearing these really short shorts..oh yeah and he was with Adam, James and Adien. They all looked so fit, I think they saw me bending over”

    It’s like that nearly every weekend, and it’s really annoying

    Also she made up that her dad has cancer, she has to be better than everyone else, like if I said my mum is in hospital, she’d say her dad has cancer and that he I going through treatment.

    Or If I said I got a newspaper job, she’d say oh yeah I’ve had one, then she’d ask me how much I get paid, then she would say she got paid about £20 more, yet I have another friend who said you’ll never get that much for a paper round job.

    Or If you got 66 marks on a test, she got 67 or 68. When she didn’t, I checked.
    When you query her lies, she gets very defensive and mean.

    She lies to me about nearly everything, I don’t know when she is speaking the truth.

    Oh yeah and she hates being wrong, if she is right, she is really happy and says ‘what did I tell you’ (it’s funny because I already knew the answer)

    She thinks she is the cleverest in the school despite not having the highest grades,
    She hates it when I do better than her (haha happens a lot) in an exam or something.

    She lies about the stupidest things like if I get a new book she’s like ‘oh I’ve read that’ then if I ask her what it’s about she can never remember.

    Is she a pathological or compulsive liar..?

    She is horrible, I really hate her.
    I once told her a secret (never again) and then she told people, when I found out she denied ever lying about it, but she did.

  • Brendan O:

    How do I get somebody to admit to things that I have proof for (although not concrete proof, just obvious proof such as always seeing him text-messaging and checks his phone then leaves the room to answer the phone) he is a compulsive liar, how do I really get to him so that he will tell me the truth?

  • The Dark Knight:

    I only lie when it is easier than telling the truth. But its becoming easier than the truth more often. Example: If my boyfriend asks me why I’m late home from work and its because I went for a drink with a colleague but I know he’ll have some questions about it if I tell him the truth I just say ‘I had to work late’. (even though the drink was entirely innocent and with a female colleague). Or if I leave my job instead of saying ‘So long suckers, I hated the job and I’m off to something much nicer with better pay!’ I will say ‘I don’t want to leave, I adore you all and loved the job and will keep in touch and the only reason I’m leaving is because I have to leave the country.’ Or if my mother asks me what I did last night, instead of saying I stayed at home alone playing on Yahoo Answers I say ‘I went out for dinner, it was lovely.’ So, tell me… am I?

  • supernerd567:

    ok, here goes…my (lets just say, to make it easier) girlfriend is a compulsive liar. Maybe not technically compulsive because she doesn’t try to tell me the sky is made of biscuits or anything…but the serious stuff…
    (the back story) about a year ago we met and started dating, we quickly got close and before long she was staying over at my house most nights. about 4 months passed and unfortunately my manic depression reared its ugly head….this is the point where she decided she couldn’t deal with it and she began to flirt and chat up other guys online. I was completely oblivious to this and about a month later we got our first flat together. (cutting to the chase) about 7 months later the feces hit the proverbial fan when i found out about a couple of the people she had been flirting etc with and i confronted her. she swore (on her baby brothers life) that that was all until the next day I pushed and she told me about sleeping with someone she had only previously referred to as a friend. the day after she spilled more beans on other ‘friends’ (after some well chosen words from myself).
    needless to say we broke up after that and went our seperate ways.

    3 months down the line we met up again and the old flame lit straight back up. i decided to be the bigger man and not only did i accept and forgive her for her wrong-doings but i also came clean about my ‘activities’ during our 3 month seperation. I asked her to tell me the same so that we could put our past behind us and start on a fresh page, to which she replied that she had done nothing except mope over the loss of myself. i knew her better than to beleive it but i kept quiet.
    it is now 3 weeks after we got back together and only 2 days ago we were at a friends when another of his friends arrived. almost instantly he began chatting to my gf and she turned to me and said (and I quote) “oh i know him, just as friends though, dont worry”
    so of course i worried. when we left the house i asked her what had really happened with her and the guy and she said ‘nothing, he asked me on a date and i said no’
    i later got it out of her that she had went on the date and kissed the guy (in itself not the crime of the century, im just focussing on the lies). later that evening after some light argueing she told me how she had also slept with someone, who turned out to be her ex, who had raped her nearly 3 years previous. I was livid as you can imagine, not just for being lied to but the fact that she let a rapist walk, then went back for more.
    i again took the righteous path and tried to forgive, benefit of the doubt type of thing. yesterday however more lies came to light, and today even more.
    as always she says that there is no more, but i cannot possibly begin to fathom how to build trust in her again.

    and i know im a world class idiot for even looking at her for the 2nd time, let alone the 3rd but i really want to beleive that there is something good in there.

    if anybody can stand to read this essay and has any helpful advise, please, please share.

    gratefully, Strachan Johnston
    ok, basically she’s a compulsive liar and after we broke up and got back together she’s still lying…and now im stuck. i cant see her on the street, and she has nowhere else to go…her fault i know, but i would like to forgive her, or at least find a way to trust her in the future. how do i learn to accept what she is telling me as the truth, or do people like this never change?

  • clntvrrt:

    I have a friend who’s a compulsive liar, how do I know when he’s lying? Is there any particular ‘signs’ ?

  • nasty1:

    This guy that I have a love/hate relationship with lies a lot. Okay I’ll give you a bit of background…we talked a lot a few months ago-he was pretty close to being my boyfriend. I would always catch him in stupid lies…all the time. Some lies were big some were small. He’s claimed about 5 times in two years that he has got a girl pregnant…different girls and they’ve all “lost the baby’s.” Like do you think I’m f*cking stupid?! He runs around telling everybody about how he’s going to be a dad…and people are like, “Oh really? Again?” I don’t know why he thinks it’s cool to be a dad at 18. He’s actually kept this up since he was 17…two years of utter bulls*it. Now he’s claming he got a girl pregnant…once again. I don’t know if he’s attention seeking or what. But it’s a bit twisted. One day he was telling me and 2 of our mutural friends about how he got another girl pregnant and what not…and I just snapped! I’m not a fake person and I refuse to listen to a bunch of bulls*it. I put him in his place and he got pissed. Ever since then we’ve been “frenemies.” The other day he show’d the whole class the “ultra- sound” picture on his phone…he also showed me. I memorized the picture and looked up “ultra-sound pictures” on google images…and I found the EXACT same picture. Why is he lying about this? Again and again? Feedback? Thanks.

  • Andres C:

    I’ve been dating my girlfriend for about a month and everything was going well. Until a few of my friends told me she was a compulsive Liar. At I didn’t believe them because you know when you like someone you don’t really see the bad stuff. But now I see she has lied about a lot of things.

    I tried to confront her about it and she said that maybe she should just break up and go on with our lives and walked away. She didn’t even try to fight for me or anything which hurt.

    Now I’m not sure what I should do. Should I let her go and move on? Should I tried and work things out and get back together? How do you deal with a compulsive liar and what should I do?

  • Praveen:

    Here’s the thing: I’m 21, my girlfriend is nearly 20. We’ve been dating for one year. One of the biggest problems we’ve had has been her compulsive lying – though she only lies when it comes to members of the opposite sex. I don’t think she’s cheated on me, but she’s lied to me at least five different (BIG) occasions throughout our year together and I’m fed up.

    1. First lie of our relationship started when we were dating. On a date, someone text her “Sup, can I see you later?”, to which she responded “Yeah, sure” (but apparently never went to see later) while she was at my house on a date. She told me it was a girlfriend. A few days later of my probes and she admitted it was her ex-boyfriend who was still apparently a friend. That’s one.

    2. Another ex-boyfriend was texting her for no reason (she hates this guy) and trying to get back with her. She lied about him contacting her and when I asked to see her phone, tried to hurry and delete his texts saying her phone did it automatically. I grabbed it before she could finish and she admitted she tried to delete them so I wouldn’t get mad. She denied him though.

    3. (5 months ago) In a new job, a co-worker got her number and claimed it was for “work-related questions”, to which she stupidly fell for. They began texting a LOT (I have her phone records) while at work for several days. She claimed it was mostly him trying to get her out at a party, her refusals and defense of our relationship, and mainly him just bugging her and trying to diss our relationship. I was looking at her phone one day and saw a text from him. She told me that it was just that ONE time, and she would stop it. Looking at her records now, it reveals that it was more than once and pretty often, and it didn’t stop until a month or two or so after I had exposed her.

    4. Her ex-boyfriend is part of her inner circle of friends. He happened to be in-town while I was actually out-of-state, and her girlfriends wanted to hang out with him on Christmas Eve. She DID tell me where she was going and that they were going over her ex’s house. Using her records, I found out they were texting a lot while she was there. She claimed she hadn’t spoken to him in over a year while she was dating me. Gigantic lie. Again I showed her the records and they try to call each other sporadically every 2-3 months or so.

    5. I just found out some guy had her number at work (I work with her, so I know the guy) but it was SUPPOSEDLY only to get directions to a party he invited her to (that I couldn’t attend since I had to work) and said it was ONLY for that. Three different days, she would text him though it would only be once, twice, or maybe three times. This happened around 5 months ago, though I just looked over the records and found it now. I asked her if anyone at work had her number, she said “no” right before I exposed her again because that guy sent her another invite that same morning. So she lied to my face again.

    We’re broken up, and she wants another chance. I broke up with her once already because of those lies and she swore she’d tell me the truth. We both agreed not to get/give numbers to new “friends” of the opposite sex. She claims she only lies because she doesn’t want to lose me. What do I believe? Are these little lies that I should forgive or will it only get worse?

  • nmlpc:

    I have been going out with my girlfriend for approx. 5 years. We moved in together in 2010. I lost my job shortly thereafter. It became very apparent, once we moved in together that she was a compulsive liar. After constantly calling her out on it, she walked out 6 weeks after we moved in together. She left me with a pile of debt and all of the expenses that come along with living in a “hipster” neighborhood (where I didn’t want to live in the first place). Spent all of my savings, ruined my credit, cashed out my 401(k) and I feel because of her I am broke and forced to rely upon her.

    We got back together 6 months later (on my part, out of desperation to survive) The lying became worse. Now it is years later, I still do not have permanent work and cannot afford to fully support myself because of the stagnant economy. I am in school and graduate in 2 years.

    I have been coasting in this relationship and treating her as the “right now” girl, fully knowing that I do not have a future with her. I no longer call her out on her lies. I honestly do not care. I feel that if she chooses to life her life that way, so be it. She has fully separated the different aspects of her life (work, school, friends, family and our relationship) so that she may perpetuate her lies without getting caught. Her friends are her life and come before everything, including me and even herself!

    I feel like I am stuck in a dead end relationship and cannot get out. I recently turned 30. I am looking to settle down and start a family. She doesn’t believe in marriage, deep to her core. I am starting to feel like such a scumbag because if I had an out, I’d take it- like we are leading each other on…

    I would really like to know how to get her help. I love her and want her to get better. But I feel like I deserve to be happy and I am NOT! In addition to being a compulsive liar, she is extremely narcissistic (a trait inherited by her father) and texts herself, acting like she’s the other person (possible split personality). How do I even confront her on any of this? Is the old adage true- people cannot be helped if they choose not to be helped?

    It is incredibly frustrating to live with a person living with mental illness(es), especially when they feel that there is nothing wrong with them. I’m looking for advice on how to get her the help she needs, how to deal with the emotional scarring that she has inflicted and what, if anything, can I do without her “freaking out”?
    @kat… Touche…. Some examples:

    1. Says she’s working, I call her office and she is off that day (happened countless times). Then she makes stories up about what happened at work that day etc.

    2. Goes to a veterinary conference in DC , May 2-5, 2013… I call hotel. The veterinary conference is May 9-12, 2013. She calls me from a DC phone number. I hear her friends in the background.

    3. Tells her friends that we are no longer living together. Tells me that she is no longer talking to her friends (Proof: Caller ID and her friend confronting me)….

    There are countless other example that can be given but I don’t want to get to personal here. It is public after all and I’d like to remain anonymous.
    @kat… Touche…. Some examples:

    1. Says she’s working, I call her office and she is off that day (happened countless times). Then she makes stories up about what happened at work that day etc.

    2. Goes to a veterinary conference in DC , May 2-5, 2013… I call hotel. The veterinary conference is May 9-12, 2013. She calls me from a DC phone number. I hear her friends in the background.

    3. Tells her friends that we are no longer living together. Tells me that she is no longer talking to her friends (Proof: Caller ID and her friend confronting me)….

    There are countless other example that can be given but I don’t want to get to personal here. It is public after all and I’d like to remain anonymous.
    @kat… Touche…. Some examples:

    1. Says she’s working, I call her office and she is off that day (happened countless times). Then she makes stories up about what happened at work that day etc.

    2. Goes to a veterinary conference in DC , May 2-5, 2013… I call hotel. The veterinary conference is May 9-12, 2013. She calls me from a DC phone number. I hear her friends in the background.

    3. Tells her friends that we are no longer living together. Tells me that she is no longer talking to her friends (Proof: Caller ID and her friend confronting me)….

    There are countless other example that can be given but I don’t want to get to personal here. It is public after all and I’d like to remain anonymous.

  • thexbox360player:

    -My girlfriend ( of 4 years ) and I have just broken up. We broke up because i just cannot trust a liar….I have now surpassed all emotions concerning true love, having been deceived by her constant lying and acting skills, as she looks deep into the depths of my eyes, finding only, that what i thought i saw in her eyes was true love, but, finding out that it was just another one of her feelingless ways, that, in the end, she got so used to speaking this way to me, that she now did’nt even show any signs that what she was actually doing to me would prove the deciding factor…along with an almost drug-like addiction to xxx smss and general requests made to her, that any person with any reasonable amount of feeling, would find an almost ” sick -feeling ” left in my stomach. If this wasnt enough for the third or fourth time we spoke about it. I was working my way up to asking her tto marry me, however i have had my heart torn out and thrown away.
    Now, I just cant take, & wont anymore

  • Xedo:

    It has recently been discovered that one of my friends is a compulsive liar and has made up a whole fantasy life and past that every single person around her was convinced was true. Why do some people lie constantly?

  • addmeonxbox360myuserisfallior:

    Ok so i met this girl over the internet(i know sad, righ?) like 7 months ago, we have had our problems but i thought we were doing pretty good. i always knew she lied about things but i just assumed they were small things. but this january we decided i should come up for her birthday day which is mid may. she told me she lived in montreal. after checking Ip addresses, i found out she lives in New york then she lied and told me she was a guy messing with me, and thats not the first time shes preteneded to do that, shes lied about so much but i dont want to leave her,…what do i do bleh.
    also theres also the chance it could be a dude messing with me..so if thats the case then der, but i some how still dont want to leave her if shes whos she says she is and i just want to help her.

  • EzioAuditore1459:

    My boyfriends ex is going around telling everyone that shes pregnant with his kid. What is really getting to us is that she’s saying shes due in January and yet the timing is waaaaaaaaaaay off. She still comes over to his place. She told me one night that I couldn’t spend the night, and then I saw her writing a letter sayin that I was cheating on him and that he should dump me for her. OK now first things first I’m not like that, and secondly hes the best guy I’ve ever been with so why the hell would I even do that? Secondly she cheated on so many guys its not even funny. So when my boyfriend saw the letter he asked me if it was true because him and I had just started dating. Anyways I wound up spending a few nights there still she didnt leave, and now she wants my @ss kicked of all things. My boyfriend said that as long as I’m dating him nothing will happen…All I want is an answer on what I should do with this stupid phsyco b!tch.I can tell she still likes him but he moved on!!!!!!
    K she’s not living there. Two he’s already told her to fuck off with her dramatics. It’s just she still likes him and she can’t see that hes moved on.

  • BRUTE:

    My Boyfriend Has Lied To Me A LOT. But Each Time Ive Stupidly Taken Him Back.
    I Split Up With Him Last Night, And After A Long Time Of Him Sat Outside My House Crying I Took Him Back With The Promise Of No More Lies.

    I Just Found Out He’d Lied Again, He’d Been Talking To A One Night Stand He Had Before We Got Together. (Only Mainly Innocent Talk, E.g. The Asking For Her MSN, But This Also Worries Me As Many Girls Have Turned Around And Told Me He Does Things On Cam For Them, He Of Course Denies It)
    I Then Asked Him If He’d Spoke To Her Recently, His Answer Was Of Course No Not Since We Got Together, Surely If It Was Innocent Hed Tell Me? Ive Not Yet Told Him That I Have Seen The Facebook Messages Between Them And Dont Know Whether To??

    He Changed His Facebook Password A While Ago Because Id Found Out Many Of His Lies And He Doesnt Know I Have It At The Moment, This Is The Reason Im Not Entirely Innocent.
    Please Help Me, I Have To See Him This Evening When He Finishes Work But I Cant Act Like Theres Nothing Wrong.

    p.s. The Woman Has Recently Become Single (And Is A LOT Older Than Him) And I Have Also Recently Started Working On Days Which He Doesnt.. A.k.a Free Time In Which He Knows I Cant Find Out Where He Is.

  • Jenna:

    I always thought people just lied to get out of trouble or to avoid something. But I know this guy who makes things up for no reason at all. He not only makes up stories, he even lies about small things that he would have no reason to lie about. What causes this?

  • happyha31:

    i know my boyfriend has been lying to me lately & making up excuses to not see me etc. he just told me through text “i’m away for a sleep for an hour” but he’s online on facebook! i’m not going to say anything, cause i’ll look like a possessive weirdo! but WHY? how can you tell someone’s lying?

  • Brody S:

    WARNING long text.
    Im desperate,I feel like im breaking down and life is not worth the trouble anymore..
    Im 16, I used to be bullied in school, and I feel like I am becoming or have become a compulsive liar. Over the past couple of years I have been making up all sorts of small lies to impress others. At times I dont even do it to impress them, though. I do it because im not good at talking and i feel like lying can bring up conversations, either because someone thinks my story is interesting or because they relate to it. It all started with tiny lies like being able to do skateboarding tricks, or being in a given sports team. Now, I recently lied and said my grandma was in the hospital getting surgery, and i had to go see her. I did it just to get out of a situation and my mom heard the lie. She is hurt. I feel the lies have escalated in size, and Im afraid its about to get out of control. However, I dont want to be seen as the ‘crazy guy’ who goes to the psychologist and lies to everyone.That would just isolate me from people, make me lose my few friends and my girlfriend. However, these relationships arent based on lies, but they will back off if they know i lie to people. Also,people at school are super rich, and im just a middle class simpleton without an exciting life, so i feel lying will change how people see me. I want to stop so bad, but medications or such things would make me feel terrible. I dont want to be treated ‘special’, so is there any way to start over, and become the actual average joe that i am meant to be, without the extra attention i have been searching for, without the lies?
    Thank you guys. So much. I realized i have the power to change and I’m still in time to do so!

  • ConfusionnaJob:

    My Ex has been lying to me since the beginning of our year and 5 month relationship. How can I tell him that he needs to get help? He is SUCH a good liar too. The best liar i’ve ever met, the person i’ve loved the most, and the person that hurt me the most. What do I do?

    Here’s a list of lies (OPTIONAL to Read, but Good to Know.)
    - We were BOTH virgins, so we started having unprotected sex when i got on Birth Control. Come to find our he slept with 2 GIRLS before me, when we were in our pre-dating process.
    - He doesn’t drink alot, when he got so drunk at a party he had sex with other girls and said “if I did I don’t remember” which was the source of our break up.
    - Says he doesn’t smoke weed, when his neighbor told me he did it yesterday
    - Says he’s not having sex with his new girlfriend of two weeks- Then Why is he asking for the stash of condoms he hid at my house & asking his neighbor if he has any.
    - Says he didn’t cheat on me, but when I say I’m going to get an STD test he says “You don’t need to go. I didn’t cheat on you.” over and over again.
    - LIed to me about having a new girlfriend when he said he’s just “taking time off from everyone to focus on himself. including girls.”

    He’s trash- i know. but what do i do?

  • thexbox360player:

    so this guy is a compulsive liar- emphasis on compulsive. i just wanna understand the reason for this- on a psychological level
    he grew up in a family that well didn’t treat him well, but that has nothing to do with lying, right?

  • sethburger:

    I lie.
    ALOT.
    I cant help it.
    I tell myself to stop it, and I decide to stop.
    But it just comes out.
    Like word vomit.
    I lie about me and boys-[[not like slutty.]]
    I lie about my friends.
    My family.
    My life.
    School.
    Everything.
    How can I stop this?
    I hate what I have become.
    What poem?
    This is no poem.
    These are my problems.

  • thexbox360player:

    I met a man…fell in love…got engaged…got pregnant…shortly afterward, I found out that he had another girl who was pregnant. Now, she was pregnant when he and I met, but he lied to me about even “being” with her. I tried and tried to get past it, but there were a lot of things I felt he was being dishonest with me about. Later, I talked to the girl, and she told me that the baby wasn’t his. We still had trust issues, and I told him that we needed time apart, to sort things out.

    That was about two months ago. We’ve been talking…he tells me that he loves me, and wants to work things out..always saying that I shouldn’t hold something against him that was in his past. Then I found out he was engaged to the first girl. Days later, I get a message from his girlfriend (not fiance’..a different girl)…long story short…he’s got four children on the way now. Two with the girl I knew about, (turns out they ARE his), mine, and another from after me.
    According to my calculations, she got pregnant RIGHT after he and I separated…He lied to me, to her, and to a LARGE number of other women..saying that he hadn’t been with anyone in 2 years…

    Now…my question is…is there anything that I can do…legally…about this, besides child support. This man is a fraud, and a compulsive liar…not to mention a sex addict.
    I have been tested, and got the all clear from my dr. I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to collect child support, as the first girl was underage when she got pregnant (he is 31). Her parents are filing statutory rape charges against him. I won’t be able to collect child support until he gets out of prison. Not that child support is a big concern. I make decent money on my own, and can fully support my family. (I also have a ten year old daughter). What I’m wondering, is, do I have any legal recourse against him. I was done having children before we were engaged. He wanted a big family (which he has now) and I wanted a family with this man. This was not a one night stand…This was a relationship that meant a lot to me, I was prepared to spend the rest of my life with him…I’m not some little hussy that jumps in the sack with every Tom, Dick, and Harry. I loved him very much. That being said, I have no intention on rekindling any relationship with him…he cannot be trusted.

  • Chester:

    I’ve been friends with this girl for going on 15 years. She’s a really good friend and there when you need her. But she lies, a lot. About literally everything, from what she ate for breakfast to being pregnant and having cancer. I don’t know what to do, if I broach the subject she will get defensive and we’ll fall out. I love her as my friend but the lies are driving me crazy. Everything I have, she has, and that’s from clothes to medical problems. She’s constantly lying about men and broke up a marriage last year because she pretended to be pregnant by her colleagues husband and she’d never even slept with him. What should I do?

  • Caltel T:

    I am a really good liar except when it comes to my girlfriend I really want to stop lying to her and she thinks that I’m lying when I tell her that. When I try to stop I just lie more I do it without even thinking about it even when I try to think about it before I lie… I still lie please help me

  • Mathew:

    Hi, I’ve known this boy, let’s call him ‘Ben’ since year 8 (I’m in year 12 now) and he’s always been the kind of person to overexaggerate. I wouldn’t say I’m friends with him but I have previously talked to him. In year 8 we were given homework to do over the holidays and he didn’t even attempt to do it and claimed that he didn’t do it as he was in America for the whole half term. This obviously wasn’t true as he was on MSN throughout the whole holiday. If never used to do his homework and made pathetic excuses up…I know, that seems like the rational thing to do. Later on in that year he got a picture of a halo character from Google, put it as his MSN picture and said that he’d drawn it. We all knew this wasn’t true and eventually found the picture on Google for ourselves.
    One thing lead to another and in year 11 he made up a fake girlfriend along with a fake Facebook account for her which only had people from our school on who’d obviously added her to see if it was fake. He used to write messages on his own profile from the girlfriend’s fake account saying that she loved him etc. Next thing we knew she died by being stabbed in the heart and her Facebook account disappeared. It wasn’t portrayed on the news or even in the local news so was a lie.
    Later on in year 11 he said he had a brain tumor and had only 10 days to live. He didn’t have anything of the sort! He’s always saying he’s on medication and the other day said he had a blood transfusion yet he was in college the next day.
    Anyway, what I’m trying to ask is that does he have something mentally wrong with him? What is causing him to lie so much and so often? It’s not like these are little white lies or something…
    Thanks for reading!

  • callofduty5123412:

    I am a 22 year old male, from London U.K…
    for as far as i can rememberi have had this issue with my character… throughout my adolescent/adult life, i have exaggerated and/or lied about myself, my past and experiences, pretty much everything to the point where i totally change character subject to social group. And i keep doing it…. to anyone and everyone… Why??? to find acceptance probably, to get people to like me… im just so damned scared of peoples thoughts of me.. what they think about me how they judge me… thats why i do it… i try to cover my real self and the insecurities that come with it… i feel safe when i lie… i can look at my best friends and family in the eye and Lie… Ever since primary school going on to secondary i was more or less outcasted by most social groups…. then going on to 6thform/college i started to pretend to be like the other kids, do things like they used to do, it was never really me, but i just got used to it… the things they used to talk about the subject of their concersations everything was do similar between these people, and i couldnt relate to any of it so thats when i started exaggerating and lying about myself to find acceptance… And this is where i am today.
    i hate myself, i literally cant bare to look myself in the mirror… im so ashamed to be myself…. i feel sick right now and mega depressed…

    i lied to my ex girlfriend of 7 months… i loved that girl to bits and iwouldve done anything for her…. i lied to her about my past, about myself, about everything… i felt shit every step of the way but things were going so well and everything was working so smoothly, i was just too afraid to loose her… i knew it would all catch up with me one day but i just used to brush it to the side and not think about it… it all came out one day when i ran out of excuses and one thing after another just got exposed…
    How do i help my self?? i need to stop this ive had enough lessons.. but i cant learn…

  • mavis24:

    I met a man…fell in love…got engaged…got pregnant…shortly afterward, I found out that he had another girl who was pregnant. Now, she was pregnant when he and I met, but he lied to me about even “being” with her. I tried and tried to get past it, but there were a lot of things I felt he was being dishonest with me about. Later, I talked to the girl, and she told me that the baby wasn’t his. We still had trust issues, and I told him that we needed time apart, to sort things out.

    That was about two months ago. We’ve been talking…he tells me that he loves me, and wants to work things out..always saying that I shouldn’t hold something against him that was in his past. Then I found out he was engaged to the first girl. Days later, I get a message from his girlfriend (not fiance’..a different girl)…long story short…he’s got four children on the way now. Two with the girl I knew about, (turns out they ARE his), mine, and another from after me.
    According to my calculations, she got pregnant RIGHT after he and I separated…He lied to me, to her, and to a LARGE number of other women..saying that he hadn’t been with anyone in 2 years…

    Now…my question is…is there anything that I can do…legally…about this, besides child support. This man is a fraud, and a compulsive liar…not to mention a sex addict.
    I have been tested for std’s , and got the all clear from my dr. I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to collect child support, as the first girl was underage when she got pregnant (he is 31). Her parents are filing statutory rape charges against him. I won’t be able to collect child support until he gets out of prison. Not that child support is a big concern. I make decent money on my own, and can fully support my family. (I also have a ten year old daughter). What I’m wondering, is, do I have any legal recourse against him. I was done having children before we were engaged. He wanted a big family (which he has now) and I wanted a family with this man. This was not a one night stand…This was a relationship that meant a lot to me, I was prepared to spend the rest of my life with him…I’m not some little hussy that jumps in the sack with every Tom, Dick, and Harry. I loved him very much. That being said, I have no intention on rekindling any relationship with him…he cannot be trusted..

  • Erfan:

    So i was seeing her for about two years. She started being openly unfaithful in front of my face and in front of my friends. She would get really drunk do and say stupid shit then in the morning when id ask her why she dumped me or why she was trying it on with other dudes or why shed accused me of sleeping with my housemates she would promptly tell me to ‘fuck off’ or say ‘get over it i was drunk’ or call me a liar . what made it even worse was that she was amazing between these ‘nuts’ periods and because of this i let her get away with this kind of stuff for the entire last year. I loved her and think i still do even though i think shes more of an ass now than she has ever been.

    The week i split up with her on the following weekend she went out with a dude to London over the weekend. She was then in a long term relationship with this guy. We were moving in together i had no one else to depend on and had saved allot of money, abandoned my social life so i could make a new better life with her. Unlike her i had no family to fall back on so it was a big call for me and when this happened it destroyed me.

    I confronted her about the things she did afterwards and she said it doesn’t matter when she met him since i dumped her. Just to put things in perspective the valentines day before i dumped her she described this guy to me. And when i say described i mean the exact size and shape of his dick. I have no idea why she was so malicious (other than the fact she was still drunk) but i suspect she had cheated on me that very morning.

    I know im going on but it just seems nuts, its been about 15 months since i finished with her. I was ill for a while stopped eating dropped down to about 9 stone but i got over it. Im now 12.5 stone all muscle i get all the attention i want from other women but i still feel shitty about it. I swore id never let anyone treat me like that again so i got ripped got an awesome job and moved home. But i still feel the same, i still get really depressed about what happened between us. And even worse i feel really guilty thinking about this while im dating other girls, Its not fair on them.

    Trust me id go into detail about some of the other stuff she did but im ashamed to admit i let her get away with it all.

    Anyone had similar experiences or have any advice?

  • Salam:

    Ive been in a pretty good relationship for sometime now….6 months (not long, but hey…lol).

    For some reason my girlfriend feels the need to lie about petty things that wouldnt matter much if she was honest up front…but sinse she isnt upfront about things, these petty issues become trust issues.

    Example….When we first started dating, she told me that she was with two people……..today, she told me that she was actually only with one person.

    She told me she completely made up a person (full name), as well as details about this person…town, school….etc.

    She has also lies about other innocent issues that wouldnt be anything major is she was just honest upfront…..

    1) Trying drugs
    2) Where she was
    …..etc
    Im losing trust in her…should i be? Why is she lying about basic useless situations?
    If she lies about petty things, is she lying about major things?
    Im so confused, im not sure what to do. Ive caught her in a total of 6 lies…..
    You think there are more lies i probably havent caught her in?

    What would everyone else do? Its hard trusting her….

    Because of this i tend to question her about everything which just makes us argue and fight all the time……

    Thanks for the help!
    We have talked about her lying on several different occurance…each time she says she is sorry and promises to stop…yets it continues..Each talk in the past ask her if there is anything else she needs to tell me and she always says no…. hen i find out more……that she was lying about!

  • josh12rox:

    I am becoming more and more certain everyday that my boyfriend of almost one year is a compulsive liar and that he has completely fabricated large parts of his life story. I am so in love with him, not for these stories, but for the fun we have together, his personality, and all the things we have planned for our life together.

    For several months I have been pushing these thoughts out of my head but the more evidence I uncover the harder this is. Its becoming harder and harder to trust him on everyday things and I feel like I don’t know who he is. Part of me wants to say something but part of me just wants our beautiful relationship to continue. I feel numb and in shock at this point.

    I can’t imagine ever being with anyone else, he is truly my soul mate. Has anyone ever experienced this? Can you make a relationship with a compulsive liar work? I am starting to feel like if I can get him to admit the things he has lied about that I am willing to work through everything in order to be with him.

    Please help me I have never felt so lost and confused in my life.
    It is not just me he has lied to, these lies are stories that all of the people at our college know.

  • PoohBearPenguin:

    My boyfriend of two years seems to start lying to me a lot lately. Why? He won’t tell me. One night I wanted to come home early due to a bad stomach ache, and he told me he was going right home, He lied. He went to his best friends house & I was getting sick and he wasn’t responding to my texts or calls. & Saturday night He stayed at his best friends house and I didn’t know and he told me he was at home, and then I needed to go get new gauges because I wanted to stretch them for my last time and he said he was coming and didn’t show & then theres lots of other stuff. But he wont tell me why hes lying.
    Me & His best friend don’t really like each other. I don’t care if they hang, just being lied to irks me.

  • johnkaiser 22:

    I found out my boyfriend had been lying about everything in his life. He had a secret fiancee, a child, another three girlfriends and many other things.

    Why would someone do that? Also why am I such a bad judge of character?

  • white man:

    My “girl” of 4 and a half years, lies about anything and everything. I don’t understand what’s the point. Her and I are both 29 years old, there should be a point at some age where you become an “adult” and put away childish ways. I guess it must be different for different people. Smh it just sucks because some people I assume don’t understand how their actions affect other people. I’ve lied plenty of times in my life, but I’ve came to realize some time ago that you don’t lie to someone you love. That’s a great form of immaturity also.

  • Jonny:

    my friend told me he had 9 girlfriends within his 22 years of life and all them were black girls. he only dates black females. Now he told me has only had 6 girlfriends and has only dated one black girl. He told me had a heart problem and scoliosis, now he denies ever telling me that and says he has no heart problems or medical issues at all for example he told me went to a university, now he tells me he goes to community college, now he went to school online. he supposedly works 50 hours a week and has 3 jobs and goes to school. he told me he only had a younger brother, that is the only family he has. then he told he has two older sisters and a younger brother. recently he told me has 3 older sisters and 3 younger brothers. i was talking to him on the phone, he told me was doing his homework in his bedroom, 5-10 seconds later I heard talking to someone in his car driving, I asked him about his homework, he told me he was never in his room doing his homework.
    very few of his stories stay consistent. majority of them are usually changing. he either denies ever having telling me. for instance, he told me he lived in a particular city, he talked to my friend online he told her lived in a totally different city.

  • Only Business:

    RE:Zobmondo
    you can only choose one!

  • Ramblin Spirit:

    This person at school I am forced to communicate with is a complete compulsive liar. Every word that he says is a lie. And most of them are so obvious. And then he gets all defensive when you say something about it or starts to put the blame on you. Like when he says “oh, my friend Bob Jones…” you actually have to go home and facebook them to see if they are even a real person.

    But what causes someone to act in this way? And how do you deal with it? Should you tell them to get help?
    And how I began to realize it was a serious problem, and not just a phase to get attention, is that he believes in his lies, and shows emotion towards them.

  • Lachlan:

    my brother has been off and on with this girl for three years. we were really good friends at first until after a year i started noticing her lying and her strong sense of control she wanted to have over my brother. i decided she was a psycho. and ive brought it up to her before and she shows no emotion. my brother and her argue. like everyday. he treats her like dirt and she sticks around like mud! i can’t stand her no longer. i want her out of my life and away from my brother. me and him use to be so close but all we do is argue. he smokes pot too. i also have to work this his ding bat gf. . Even our co-workers talk about how she exaggerates these dragged out fabricated “fairy tales” that are obviously not true. when you ask her a question her initial reaction is to lie. like its a reflex. i try to tell my brother this but he thinks I AM being the drama queen and starting stuff? so i recently looked up compulsive lying and it describes her to the T. when she is confronted about a lie she will cover it up with another lie. im afraid she does this stuff to my brother. what do you think?
    pentee p: THAT DID NOT ANSWER MY QUESTION?

  • Krazy Bob:

    When dealing with a compulsive liar, how do you make them realize just how much anger, frustration, and pain their lies are causing?

    When someone is a compulsive liar, is it likely that they are a cheater too?

  • SKATEskum:

    sources PLEASE!!

  • evangldbrg:

    I know exactly what they are (a person who always lies) I’m afraid I am one. . .

    I’ve lied about these two guys that like me outside of school and a triangle of love happened to al of my friends. The reason as to why I made it up was because of pure jealousy. All of my friends at some stage had boyfriends or people who liked them and I just made up them so I can relate. The lie has been going on for three years now! I want it to stop but I just make up more lies as if I can’t help myself.

    Only one of my friends who never believed me knows they aren’t real and so does my aunty.

    So please help me I don’t know what to do, who should I see? Should I tell my parents?
    Help

  • Sergeant Pickle:

    I am one. I’m wondering why.

  • Con Orpe:

    First off: don’t even think about saying ‘you could be lying now’. If you took a moment to think about it, you would see that it’s sort of a paradox: I am lying about being a compulsive liar, therefore I am one but I cannot be a compulsive liar because I was lying about being one which means I am lying about lying etc…

    Right, so I lie to make myself seem more interesting: sometimes it’s small like telling someone I have a hospital appointment to fix my dodgy back when I’m really going to the dentist but otherwise the lies are really, really big: the most recent being telling my classmates that I’m a lesbian and that my family are moving to America so I can get specialist treatment for a rare illness.

    So it’s got to the point where there’s no point in me talking because no one is sure if I’m telling the truth or not. Most of my previous questions on here are lies (not all, though). How do I stop? I tried taking away all luxuries and then rewarding myself when I told someone the truth or prevented a lie, but that didn’t work for long.

    Thanks to any genuine answers
    Point of interest: my lies usually seem to be centered around ‘touchy’ subjects, e.g. being lesbian, or lying about committing crimes like theft. Any reason for that, does anyone know?

  • Dom L:

    Is this mental illness or compulsive lying
    A girl in my class sets off arguments with me and many others for no reason her group is the tomboys at school and we are sort of averagely populars .
    She just says things to me like her and her boy friend had un protected sex which i don’t beleive because tbh she is ugly and imature and it just would not have happened she has named this boyfried 3 different names to 3 different people and she told a teacher i was upsetting her an di hadn’t done anything apart from egnore the lies .Then she creates a huge crappy mess and leaves me to sort it . The teacger who she told is my dads best friend and then the girl said that i said he won’t beleive you because he knows me more . I never said this btw and she then when she comes up to me and goes i’m going to have a fight with you and i say go on then if you’re hard hit me but i will hit you back and then she cries off to a teacher because she knows she is loosing ad now she is walking round school saying OMG you’ve got your cousin to hit me which i never and then my cousin even said that she never said it . She takes lies so far in her head that she actually beleives what she makes up . After 3 years of this i’m starting to think she needs proffesional help what do you think is this just compulsive lying thats out of control or does she need a specialist ????

  • Chris R:

    To any compulsive liars, since this is anonymous, can u be truthful for once and tell exactly why you lie and do u regret hurting those that were closest to you. Did you get defensive when you were caught? Do you like because you are ashamed?? i am very curious, serious answers please….thanks.

  • RxP DarkBox:

    MY friend is 22 and all he does is lie, and he justify it everytime. I cant stand it any longer but he is such a nice person but jst dont realise he is sick in the head!

  • Mc L:

    I’m pretty sure my sister is one of these but I’m having trouble figuring out which one….

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